Friday, January 21, 2011

Dating The Bad Boy

When it comes to dating there is a trend amongst women that tends to cause us more pain than gain as time goes on. For some internal reason women tend to fight for, seek out, and pin-point the biggest of bad boys. I don’t believe that women are necessarily out to find the men who treat them the worst, but I do see a rolling trend that points toward our incessant need to help, change, and nurture. Sometimes we capitalize on this even when we find someone who needs none of those things.

Some women will find men who are an obvious opposite in comparison to themselves; this is not necessarily a conscious decision more of a decision based on the woman’s need to change others. Other women unconsciously seek out men with ‘issues’; either they drink too much, have a temper problem, they cheat, or they just don’t have the capacity to care for others, but no matter what the ‘issue’ may be for that man the woman seeking him out may find that she has an obscure need to help others. While she may feel that she is doing a good deed in her own mind, by definition she is unintentionally bringing chaos into her own life.

As women we have certain nurturing aspects to our personality. This is instinctual and unintentional but it is certainly a blessing for those we love. Our nature is to assist. Although it is hard to resist our deepest urges when we are looking for a guy, there are specific agendas that we have to learn to separate from our love life. The definition of a perfect guy is one who is there for you as equally as you are for him, he compliments your flaws as you compliment his, and he contributes just as much emotionally, physically, and mentally to the relationship as do you. There is a very apparent equality to relationships.

If a woman finds herself dating an egotistical man then she finds herself dishing out all of the compliments while receiving none. The situations may be different but the concept behind the relationship remains the same. You must find your equal to be truly happy in a dating relationship. If a woman is seeking to fully nurture then she will always find herself in an unfulfilling, immature, or just plain dissatisfying relationship. We must be as mature-minded as the men we wish to date.

View the original article here

No comments:

Post a Comment